WHAT CHANGES DO I NEED TO MAKE IMMEDIATELY

And, from mid-November 1994.

• find time to focus / center
• don't do multiple things at once--just because I can doesn't mean I have to
• stay out of wasteful, unproductive conversations
• limit exposure to excessive negativity
• don't spread petty frustrations
• insist on exercise
• prioritize personal devotional / growth
• realistically evaluate home responsibilities--redistribute or revise
• keep a tight hold on social commitments, excursions, even conversations that distract, confuse, and frustrate
• pursue healthy, nurturing connections and relationships

"He is able more than able to accomplish what concerns me today...

If I could look through your eyes, I would see that I'm worthy...

I'm learnin' how to lean and depend on Jesus. He's my friend and He's my guide...

Little by little I've been learning to depend upon the Savior. I know He's gonna provide for my every need."

Willow Creek Community Church Ever Devoted CD (c) 1994, Rory Noland & Greg Ferguson

WOW! Such wisdom then and just as applicable now. A great reminder

WHEN YOU ASK FOR BREAD...

An entry from my journal November 7, 1994, a Monday...

A sad, difficult weekend... DM called very, very early Saturday A.M. His college girlfriend broke up with him within 24 hours of his arrival in France to visit her. He really seemed to be handling it well, but still he was very hurt, as we were for him. He was quite proactive... determined to make the trip and expense worthwhile. He had already had dinner with Frank--a French young man he met on the train from Avignon to Montpelier.

Talked with DM again this morning. JP doesn't want to proceed with the relationship because she doesn't feel he's the man God has for her long-term. Wants to remain friends. DM is cooperating--still hurt and rejected. Me, too!

I reassured him--he is the young man God created him to be--constantly evolving, but he can't change to suit JP or anyone. His heart is to please God. He's 22 years old and doing quite well--he's seeking and gaining godly maturity.

When he gets back to IL he'll have to refocus and re-establish his social life. The future is exciting.

I told him God might ask, "Can you continue to trust me now, even if I never tell you why?"And,
"When you ask for bread, will He give you stones instead?"

14 years later and so much is clear now. DM has continued to grow and to serve God in full-time ministry. He lives in Europe and has married a beautiful, intelligent, gifted, loving, sparkling young woman and has two gorgeous and vibrant little girls.

What a ride! If JP had hesitated to end the relationship, we might have all missed out on all the adventures that God has taken us on--so many trips to Europe. Experiencing and living in new cultures. The foods and markets and cities of Europe. The love and joy of doing family in two languages--finding ways to communicate without just words. We will just hang on and let God continue to take us over mountains and through valleys and across fields of sunshine and harvest. We will remember to thank Him when we are in the valley of the shadow of death and feeling there is no sunshine, only sorrow.

RECOVERY

Recovery is not an all-or-none issue. Rather, it is an ongoing process that continues in the here and now, over a multiplicity of here and nows... Healing and integration are the opposite of the confusion and chaos of the past... We begin to identify our needs and search out ways to get them met in a healthy manner. And, we begin to practice being real by being our real self.
Healing the Child Within
Charles L. Whitfield

I have been in recovery for over 14 years now. I like me better now. I know that I will always struggle, but that in God's eyes, I am a "kid under construction." I can do that. I can continue to grow and to change with God's direction and help. I don't like criticism but when I get it, after a few moments, hours, days, weeks, I am able to process it and apply what is necessary and I do change. But, if it is unjustified, you will be hearing back from me!

The way out of our pain is through it.
Whitfield, again