Saturday, August 14, 2010


My dad is in the hospital and I'm not sure what to do. He's not very sick, yet. He's also 89 years old and therefore an uncertain future. He's been incredibly healthy with just a few small scares along the way, and only a hernia surgery or two. No heart attacks, and until last winter no strokes. Last winter he had two TIAs, but recovered almost fully with a bit of a slur and a slight limp for just awhile.

Funny thing, he's always been quite concerned with his health. I guess being healthy is no guarantee that you can celebrate your health.

My mother died suddenly, without warning. A cough, bronchitis, lethargy, hospitalization, death and everlasting life. All within 5 or 6 days. My father-in-law died slowly and agonizingly with emphysema--gasping for breath and struggling with life.

I don't know what's ahead--we never really do, I know. For the immediate future I have to decide whether I take a quick trip to Central Illinois or wait it out. It's hot and humid, and I've been there too many times in the last weeks. CA is busy with soccer so nothing but my own selfish heart could make me not go. I've left a message with JL in Michigan to see what her plans are and if we'll plan together.

I've done enough hibernating and navel gazing the past two weeks. Self-examination sucks. Helping others is life-giving and God-honoring.

I'm sure I'll make the right decision.

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